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Free Wedding Vows: for the LA Couple

I honestly never thought this would work out.  When I heard that you lived all the way in Santa Monica, I knew we were doomed.  But even the 405 freeway couldn’t keep us apart.


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I love you so much that I actually want to share my mantra with you. 

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You’ve stuck by me through thick and thin… even when my racist emails got leaked.

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I promise never to stop at the Cupcake ATM when you’re on a cleanse.  Luckily, there’s an organic pressed juice ATM right next door. 

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I vow to never zone out when you pitch me a screenplay idea.

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Thank you for letting me use my headshot for our Save the Date cards.

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I promise to stick by you, even if a botched plastic surgery makes you look like Bruce Jenner.

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I vow to get over my fear of the ocean (it’s so dirty) and actually make it to one of your Muscle Beach workouts.

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I promise not to bring our children to Coachella until they’re 30.

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I vow to never skip our daily Runyon Canyon hike, even if I’m in labor.

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You’re going to be the perfect first wife.  I can’t wait to spend the next 5-6 years with you. 

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