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Quiz question: What’s the one object that can be used as a drinking glass, a terrarium, a chandelier, a picture frame, a candle-holder, a toiletry bag, a name-card, and an adorable way to make a single serving of s’mores cake? If you guessed “mason jar,” you must be planning a wedding.

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Quick memo to anyone planning a wedding: YOU DON’T NEED A PHOTO BOOTH. Photo booths were fun when the whole idea of instant photography was a novelty. Remember when you were excited about Polaroids? Yeah, THAT’S when a photobooth would have been a cool wedding idea. But today, we all carry perfectly pocket-sized photo booths with us everywhere we go. Oh yeah, and they’re also phones, TVs, and portals to the internet too.

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Cake pops are like those little Chihuahuas that ladies carry around in their purses—cute, but ultimately useless and irritating. I know that weddings should have a certain degree of cuteness, but there IS such a thing as too cute. And a tiny piece of cake on a stick, bedazzled with sprinkles or decorated like a tiny bride? THAT is too cute. 

You know what a cake pop looks like? A lollipop. And you know who eats lollipops? Children.

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Some people just don’t dance, okay? Leave them alone. I know you feel like everybody takes dance lessons to prepare for that first dance. But here’s the thing: nobody is a good enough teacher to make your fiancé look like he’s comfortable dancing.  I don’t care if he’s pretending to really, really be on board for this. Trust me. He doesn’t want to learn a dance. 

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