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put a zing on it

Genitalia Themed Products You Need to Have at Your Bachelorette Party 

Your bridesmaids are all wearing their hot pink novelty sashes. Your plastic tiara is bobby pinned in place. You’ve been drinking mimosas since dawn, and you’re ready to paint the town red before you get dressed all in white. It’s bachelorette party time!

But what about all the penises????  And for the ladies marrying ladies, the vaginas and breasts?!

It’s a known fact that if you don’t spend half the night goofing around with genitalia-themed items in all forms, your bachelorette party is pretty much a bust (no pun intended). 

So lucky for you, we’ve found 11 products to make sure your last night as a single woman is the best night of your life. 

1. Penis Straws

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Image Source: thebestisyettobeblog.com

Penis straws are the staple of any good bachelorette party. Just make sure your bridesmaids don’t fight over who gets the purple one! 

2. Penis Piñata

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Image Source: bachelorette-partyideas.com

Save the pink bat to use on your wedding night. Your husband will LOVE it. We promise!

3. Willy Whistles

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Image Source: peckaproducts.com

Because bachelorettes and their bridesmaids aren’t nearly loud or annoying enough. 

4. Penile Pup

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Image Source: reallyghey.com

Please make this unfortunately spotted dog the mascot of your bachelorette party.  He’d look so CUTE in a novelty “He put a ring on it” t-shirt! 

5. Pin the Junk on the Hunk

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Image Source: media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com

Be warned: this game is only truly funny after your third round of tequila shots. 

6.  Penis Pastry 

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Image Source: media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com

It is truly amazing how the adult cake industry has been able to turn traditional wedding vows into sexy suggestions. 

7. Penis Pasta

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Image Source: bachelorettepartyfun.com

To be served in a Parmesan cream sauce.  Meatballs optional. 

8. Vodka Luge

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Image Source: gadgetsandgear.com

To be perfectly honest, this penis shaped vodka luge is an architectural wonder. 

9. Penis Velcro Catch: Balls Not Included

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Image Source: sexylovestuff.com

Everyone’s favorite childhood beach game has returned for your bachelorette party.  Have fun trying to play this in a crowded bar! 

And for the ladies marrying ladies…

10. The Breast Beer

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Image Source: pinterest.com

Let’s be real, nobody’s drinking iced tea out of that thing. 

11. Bakery Bod

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Image Source: minutebuzz.com

Granted, this edible naked lady looks like she’d be more at home at a surgeon’s graduation party. 

12. Wear this while you’re scarfin’ down drinks!

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Image Source: Etsy 

Crafty bridesmaids can knit a pair to keep the bride-to-be warm before the wedding night. 

13. Hey! Quit staring at my neck! 

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Image Source: Etsy 

Make sure that everyone at Drag Bingo Night knows that you’re with the best bridal party ever. 

14. Paging Georgia O’Keefe

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Image Source: Etsy 

It’s the pearl detail that really classes up this labia necklace.

15. Instructional Candies

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Image Source: candyladyxxx.com

Just take your time and savor these varied vaginas. 

16. Boobs & Butts Cupcakes

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Image Source: media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com 

Because nothing says “lifetime of commitment” like naughty baked goods!

17. There’s also these…

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Now that you’re acquainted with the weird and wonderful world of novelty genitalia, you’ll have lots to practice on before a lifetime of wedded bliss. 

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